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Life Uncategorized

Muncy State Prison, Lucifer, and God

MUNCY STATE PRISON

December 30th, 2018

Drama, drama, drama–on the way to breakfast someone took somebody else’s cigarette, and of all the bad luck, I got seated with the slighted person, who was throwing a fit for the entire breakfast. Her friend was trying to calm her down, but she was all yelling and threatening to beat people up–how dumb. Her friend pointed out that she would only get kicked out of SIP if she did, but it didn’t help. I wanted to say if that’s the worst thing that happens to her today, she’s doing pretty good, but I didn’t want to get punched in the face. NA is pretty soon, which I am looking forward to. “The Word Among Us” is about taking care of our parents when they are old.

Hm.

I sincerely doubt that my parents are going to want ME taking care of them, but I don’t think my siblings would ever do it.

I guess we’ll see.

“Beside th Still Waters” likens humans to a clock that God winds up. “Productivity in Christ’s kingdom will be higher if we spend less time on repairs and more time on maintaining our connection to the Source of Life.” –Mike Weirich –Halsey, OR

I guess I’ll read “Lucifer Exposed” by Derek Prince.

“If we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin. (1 John 1:7)

“For the message of the Cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” – 1 Corinthians 1:18

This book says that drugs are a form of sorcery.

Hm.

“For our citizenship is in heaven, from which we eagerly wait for the Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.” (Phil. 3:20)

“For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace.” (Romans 6:14)

11/01/2026 7:36pm (When I am transcribing this into Google Docs) I asked God out loud– “Am I even supposed to be doing this?” and got this answer: Angel number 320 is a spiritual message of harmony, faith, creative self-expression, and divine guidance.

Core Breakdown by Digit

• Number 3: Resonates with creativity, communication, joy, growth, and the presence of the Ascended Masters.

• Number 2: Brings energies of balance, trust, cooperation, service, and your life’s soul mission.

• Number 0: Amplifies spiritual development, infinity, universal energy, and the “God force”.

Key Meanings and Interpretations

• Trust and Divine Timing: According to numerology breakdowns on platforms like Sacred Scribes Angel Numbers, 320 appears when you need to maintain faith and trust that your life is moving in the right direction, even during periods of confusion.

• Creative Expression: The number encourages you to express your thoughts and feelings openly through art, writing, or communication, helping you feel free and inspired.

Moving on:

“Owe no one anything except to love one another for he who loves another has fulfilled the Law.” (Romans 13:8 – 10)

“I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.”  (Galatians 2:20)

I guess there’s no NA today, they never called it.

Darn.

“The great dragon…that serpent of old…the Devil and Satan, who deceives the whole world. (Rev. 12:9)

“So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised. For in just a very little while, ‘He who is coming will come, and will not delay. But my righteous one will live by faith. And if he shrinks back, I will not be pleased with him.’ But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved.” (Hebrews 10:35 – 39 NIV)

Last sentences of the book:

Will you commit yourself to do what Jesus said? Deny yourself. Take up your cross. Follow Him!”

Onto “Imaginations: More Than You Think,” by James P. Gills M.D.

The three “foundational principles” of this book are:

[1.] “We are what we think; therefore, our thoughts determine our actions.”

[2.] “Our present thoughts affect how we will spend eternity. When our thoughts are faithfully focused on God, we will be rewarded with an eternal mind-set in this life. We will have a glimpse of the blessings of eternity now, and will be richly rewarded, as well, when we experience His presence in heaven.”

[3.] “God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him. Our greatest joy is surrendering our thoughts and our lives to God.”

“Be careful what you think because your thoughts run your life.” –Proverbs 4:23, NCV

“Albert Einstein said, ‘Imagination is more important than knowledge.’”

Hm.

That’s a little heavy for me right now.

I think I’ll check out “Care of the Soul” by Thomas Moore.

“‘Soul’ is not a thing, but a quality or dimension of experiencing life and ourselves. It has to do with depth, value, relatedness, heart, and personal substance.”

This is interesting, and seems to fly in the face of modern medicine: “What the great sixteenth-century physician, Paracelsus, said about healing applies to care of the soul: ‘The physician is only the servant of nature, not her master. Therefore, it behooves medicine to follow the will of nature.’”

Interesting.

“Storytelling is an excellent way of caring for the soul. It helps us see the themes that circle in our lives, the deep themes that th=ell the myths we live.”

“The ultimate cure, as many ancient and modern psychologies of depth have asserted, comes from love and not from logic.”
The sun is shining brightly today, and it’s very pretty. Ellen has been in bed all day. We were supposed to go to Yard and walk the track for an hour today, but she wouldn’t get out of bed.

There is currently a hot debate outside my cell about the difference between the phrases, “Ima beat her ass,” and “Ima smack a bitch.”

There’s a lot of hostility in here today.

*sigh*

I wish this part of my life was over. I’m fed up with it. Of course, I have more than a month left of living here. I need a shower. I thought I would be able to take one after breakfast, but the CO wouldn’t let me. I’m gross and sick of myself today.

Back to my book.

“…there is evil in the world and in the human heart. If we don’t recognize this, we have a naive attitude that can get us into trouble.”

“The Greeks told the story of the minotaur, the bull-headed flesh-eating man who lived at the center of the labyrinth. He was a threatening beast, and yet his name was Asterion–Star. I often think of this paradox as I sit with someone with tears in her eyes, searching for some way to deal with a death, a divorce, or a depression. It is a beast, this thing that stirs in the core of her being, but it is also the star of her innermost nature. We have to care for this suffering with extreme reverence so that, in our fear and anger at the beast, we do not overlook the star.”

Wow.

I like that.

This is interesting.

“If we were to observe the soul in the family by honoring its stories and by not running away from its shadow, then we might not feel so inescapably determined by family influences.

When I was growing up, I swore I would never be anything like my Mother, because she always made me feel like an outcast, an unwanted nuisance.

Now, all three of my children are being raised by others, and, to my horror, one of those people is the very mother who always (and still does) rejected me.

Oh, the guilt.

Ellen is up, and singing at the top of her lungs, which renders reading almost impossible.

Almost dinnertime.

I guess I’ll write my kids’ letters a day early.

There–I wrote them that I loved them and that I hope they had a wonderful Christmas and birthday (Tiger). I also told Tiger that some of the best memories of my life are making cakes with her and telling stories with her before bedtime about unicorns and other animals getting through the woods to go home.

I didn’t really have much else today, other than I wanted them to write me and tell me what they got.

*sigh*

Now the conversation in the hallway is about whether Black or White adolescents have oral sex first, age-wise.

Yuck.

I don’t want to think about it, personally.

After dinner–on the way back from dinner a CO saw a transaction between a brown and a blue–trading coffee for tobacco–and flipped out and called us all a bunch of names–dumb and stupid, mostly.

Then, half the line got searched, myself included.

Fun times.

Back to my book, “Care of the Soul.”

This book is very abstract. I’m finding myself skimming paragraphs and not really absorbing them, so it’s time to read something else.

How about, “Moments with the Saviour: A Devotional Like (?) of Christ” by Ken Gine

Let us see what this has to offer.

Ellen is singing and dancing to “Superfreak.”

“…God’s purposes are not thwarted by our humanity, however weak and wayward it may be. That he works in us and through us, and more often than not, in spite of us. That he works with us, as a gardener works with his garden.:

Oh my.

Ellen just found a big hairball in her pants.

Funny.

Bed.

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Life Uncategorized

Saving the Ending World

11/1/2026

November 1st, 2026

Daylight Savings Time Ends

Angel number 1101 is a divine message of new beginnings, personal growth, and creative expression. It signals that your thoughts manifest rapidly, and you are being guided to take conscious leadership over your path.

Core Numerology Breakdown

• Number 1 (Repeating Three Times): Symbolizes new beginnings, independence, creation, motivation, and the power to shape your own reality. Seeing three 1s amplifies these energies significantly.

• Number 0: Represents infinite potential, the “God force,” spiritual journeys, and the amplification of whatever numbers stand beside it.

• Reduction to 3 (1 + 1 + 0 + 1 = 3): Number 3 stands for communication, self-expression, joy, and creativity. Many interpret 1101 as the message that past false starts or quiet pauses weren’t failures, but a refinement leading to a stronger, more authentic voice.

Key Areas of Meaning

• New Beginnings & Career: Seeing 1101 often pops up when you are on the verge of a fresh start, a creative project, or a career shift. It encourages you to step out of your comfort zone and trust your inner wisdom.

Angel number 201 (or 0201) brings a spiritual message of trust, balance, and new beginnings.

Meaning of Individual Digits

• Number 2: Represents balance, patience, cooperation, and listening to others.

• Number 0: Amplifies spiritual connection, potential, and infinite possibilities.

• Number 1: Symbolizes new beginnings, independence, and taking the first step forward.

• Number 3 (Reduced sum: 2 + 0 + 1 = 3): Relates to creative expression, growth, and joy.

What It Means for You

• The Listener Who Speaks: In numerology, 201 often describes someone who spends time absorbing, learning, and supporting others before suddenly realizing they have their own original voice and path to share.

• Reassurance from Angels: Seeing this number is a sign that your angels support you, and you are making steady—even if subtle—progress on your soul mission.

• Stay Grounded: It encourages you to maintain faith in your abilities and make conscious, positive choices as you step into a fresh cycle.

2:07pm

I spent the morning hours making food for and loving on Paul, who, I have realized, I treat like a giant baby.

I do.

I just now, in the past few days, realized it, and I have to stop it, because I am feeding into a cycle of him not taking care of himself.

He just sort of forces or guilts or pays others to take care of him and his needs, and then so refuses to take care of them himself.

He just refuses to take care of himself.

I love him, but I can’t stand his lack of empathy and compassion for others.

I don’t know if it’s the never having children?

Probably that’s what it is with Gem too, they just don’t develop that “seeing the world through another person’s eyes.”

It’s the whole Empathy and Compassion Thing, yoooooooooooooooooouuuuu know?

They just…don’t.

Ugh.

And then there’s Motorcycle, whose mother lavished him with praise and love, telling him he was the greatest thing that ever existed, creating a man that craved that sort of attention forevermore, expecting it from women his entire life who could never compete with that sort of over-the-top, grandiose, unrealistic kind of “You’re Always Right And Good,” love, and also creating a man who could never deal with being wrong.

I’ll never understand them.

But, I guess I do, in a way–I remember being 16, and only liking animals, and not people, because, mostly, animals were never mean to you unless you were mean to them first.

I could understand them.

You don’t hurt me, I don’t hurt you.

Cool.

We good.

People are not the same.

People will hurt you for no reason.

For fun.

For sport.

Especially boy people, and then later, men people.

And people like my Mother.

They think it’s funny, or it satisfies them in some sick, and twisted, and vicious kind of way.

I never thought it was funny, or could understand how, they could laugh at my obvious embarrassment and my humiliation, my outright, blatant, severe, out-there-for-everyone-to-see, kind of pain.

How could that ever, ever, EVER be funny to you?

Please, can you explain that to me, like I am a kindergartener?

Must be that never had happened to you.

Must be that YOU never had to feel that HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE SHAME, and emotional and mental and physical PAIN, and HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME kind of OVERWHELMING and ALL-CONSUMING kind of PAIN????!!!

It never occurred to me that it DID happen to them, and that THAT’S why they did it to me, because when you FEEL that sort of RIP YOUR GUTS OUT kind of SHAME, that you DIDN’T DESERVE and got BEATEN ON for NO REASON by someone A LOT BIGGER than you, maybe, when you were just little, and you couldn’t do a FUCKIN’ THING to DEFEND yourself, welp, I guess, in some cases, some people just want to do that do another person.

Animals do that too, if you beat ’em bad enough.

They get real mean and nasty, and there’s almost nothin’ that you can do to love it out of them.

That’s why I stuck with animals, when I was growing up, and most of my twenties too.

I just didn’t understand a world where you could be born to a Mother who hated you, and a step-brother who thought you were a sex toy, and a Dad who was just trying so hard to please the Mother (still is) that he couldn’t see the Truth Right In Front Of His Face (still can’t), and then, the Get Outta Here, No Fucking Kidding, Really? Cherry On the Topper of THAT Fucking Cake–A TWIN SISTER Who Was So Obsessed with Getting Mommy to Love Her (Still Is) That She Hates On You (to, like–your Entire Town, and the County Judge, and, CYS workers, and the District Attorney–you know–the Life Ruiners) To This Day, Every Single Goddamn Chance She Gets!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And a Little Bro who just thinks I’m a crazy person, and doesn’t believe in God–or anything at all–except for wacko conspiracy theories about The Grateful Dead being in control of the Universe or something.

Whatev.

Anyway.

Motorcycle just messaged me that he’s going to do his dishes today.

Well, good for you, man, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve done your dishes.

I can, however, tell you how many times you’ve done mine, and that’s a big, fat, ZERO.

You know, Tabby asked me the other day if I would be with Zuko if she ever got out of prison, and I immediately said a big, fat, YES.

She brought up how the men in my life aren’t the kind of “Save the World” kind of people, like I am, but Zuko is, you know?

You know?

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII KNOW.

As soon as Motorcycle kicked me out the last time, he started burning plastics again and stopped recycling.

Like–the instant my stuff was gone.

Paul only does it when it’s convenient for him.

Gem never does.

I’ll never understand people.

What are they going to do in a few weeks when the entire grid collapses, like everybody says it’s going to?

People are still, like, standing around, playing their violins, like, while the Titanic is fucking sinking…aaaaaaaaaaaaand NOBODY’S SAYING ANYTHING.

Like, seriously?

ALL of the governments around the WORLD are warning people about being self-sufficient for at least 90 days.

And people are just, like, lah-de-dah, like, I have to go, and like, get my fucking nails done, like, when it was COVID, and shit.

But this is much bigger than COVID.

AND COVID WAS BIG.

THE U.S. MILITARY IS DIGGING MASS GRAVES.

Those are for US, guys.

THOSE ARE FOR US.

What are people going to do?

Here’s my advice:

Start stocking up on canned goods, and start saving enormous amounts of water, and no, I’m not even close to kidding.

Stock up on your pet food too, and share this post, if you care, even a little, about your life, or the lives of those around you.

Water, canned food, pet food, tell the people around you that you love them.

I’m not even close to kidding, and this is not fear-mongering.

This is the truth.

Love, Justine

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Life

Hello, world.

Welcome to my life. I am a mother, vet tech, writer, reporter, felon, life-partner, bereaved parent, animal lover, divorcee, lover of music, singer, lover of people, and connector of people–not in that order, and among other things.

We are here because we are connected to each other.

Our stories connect us.

This is my most real, raw, authentic story of my life so far.

I am sharing this with you from the depths of my soul.

Be careful with it.

Maybe someday I can hear your story too, and we can be more connected.

Thank you for your interest in my life.

I am more than willing to share what I have learned.

We all should share our stories courageously and freely.

My wish to the Universe is that I can become part of the beginning of a new, more learned, compassionate, healthy, whole, empathetic, wise, and cared-for generation.

This starts by the sharing and connection of our stories.

Here is mine.